My Gramma is not doing well. Dad said today that Aunt Carol is going - though she shouldn't be in a hospital because her immune system is so shot - to say goodbye "just in case." I think she feels like she doesn't have a reason to live.....She's apparently starving herself. Her stomach is messed up still from the nursing home "grip" that she and her roommate both had for over a week before she was admitted to the hospital, and she says she can't hold anything down.
I don't know what to think.
I know she's not happy, but I can't see her thinking its ok to just starve herself and let herself die. I'll be devastated if she dies, but I hate seeing her deteriorate - she's frail, thin (and getting thinner by the day), she fell - which is what got her in the rehab center from her apt in the first place - and could fall again at any time, she can't hear, she can't see well, she can't stay awake, she can't eat, she's depressed about her son, daughter, and nephew being ill, and that her sister just died. And I think she's stopped caring about herself.
I hate this. I hate death. Its not even here and just knowing its coming is unbearable.
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